2013-02-23 / Editorials & Letters

No apologies for being a friend


Recently some friends around Buckeye Lake who I thought were friends took me to school. It hurt me deeply. You see they found out that I was speaking to Marty Springer. I’ve known Marty for about 30 years. She and Bud helped me tremendously for three years with BLASST when I was about to lose my mind. Marty helped me with personal problems as well. She was always upbeat and could multi-task like nobody’s business; a talent I don’t possess. I have watched her take care of many people at one time while working a full time job. I couldn’t get done in a week what she can in half a day. Here’s the thing; sometimes good people do bad things. That doesn’t make them bad people.

A wise man, also a friend I know, put a sign on his Facebook page that read, “Don’t judge someone just because they sin differently than you.” That’s right we all sin and because of that, it’s not safe to live in a glass house and throw boulders.

It’s amazing to me that until I die I will still be finding out who my true friends are. To me if someone is going to hate me for no reason, I’m going to give them one. Marty Spring was, is and always will be my friend. Many people around the lake think they know me. That isn’t even a little bit true. Many have an opinion about me whether they know me or not.

I can tell you this. If you were a close friend of mine and you took a sledge hammer to my toes, those few have spent years trying to fix what they broke. I’m not mad at them. I don’t talk about them - they just simply don’t exist anymore. Self-preservation is a huge must do in my book.

You have to take the good with the bad, smile when you’re sad, love what you’ve got and remember what you had. Always forgive, but don’t forget. Learn from your mistakes, but never regret. People change, things go wrong, and life goes on.

Every day is an internal fight for me about my youth and the two people who raised me. If I didn’t learn to forgive them, I would be where my older brother Bobby is now, six feet under. Every day is hard. I haven’t spoken to my mother in 37 years, except at my brother’s funeral in 2002. Learn to forgive or it will eat you from the inside out. Learning to forgive will be a challenge for me that I am willing to take on for the rest of my life. Anger and hate take far more energy than all other emotions put together. I know because I have been full of both, but it’s getting better every day I live because I work at it with God’s help. I’m just saying...

Tory Wolfe
West Bank

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